In September last year I planned to start a blog series "Things I've done to improve my Wellbeing". I wrote one post, about reading, then I didn't write any more for that series.
In November I followed it up with "Things I STOPPED doing which affected my Wellbeing".
I could easily think that I failed in not continuing with that series or in fact not doing the things that made my Wellbeing thrive.
But, sometimes life gets in the way. Not just negative things, but positive things.
I got engaged and I was on a high. 7 months later I'm still on that high and still look at the beautiful ring on my finger and relive the day my amazing fiancé surprised me.
I was really proud (should stop using past tense)....I AM really proud that I am now able to recognise, when I'm feeling low, the things that have changed and may be making me feel that way.
Is it things I can control? Yes. Then I have the duty and responsibility to do something about it.
Is it things I can't control? No. Then I have the duty to be able to hand that over and not let it get me down. That is easier said than done. Especially when you like being in control but it is necessary.
My life has changed a lot recently, for the better. And I want to pick up that series and write about the changes I've made. Some of them are recent changes, some are things I have done for a while now and are really important to me and a "non-negotiable".
This one started in September 2023. September 11th to be exact. My birthday.
I was never really bothered about working on my birthday. I've always done it and have only ever not if it fell on the weekend. But that year I made the decision to book the day off as annual leave.
I didn't have anything specifically planned, but that was ok. I'd just had a lovely weekend with my then-boyfriend-now-fiancé. But the main reason I chose to have the day off was that I didn't want anything that happened at work to potentially make the day feel "ruined".
I didn't want any element of stress, I didn't want anyone or anything to put a dampener on the day.
I prioritised myself for a change and decided that I deserved a good day.
I booked myself in for a tattoo and just did whatever I wanted, by myself, for the day, until it was time to collect my boys from school.
And that was when I started to take Wellbeing Days.
A day of annual leave to do whatever I want.
Do I want to catch up with housework? Yes. Ok, do it.
Do I want to sit and watch tv all day? Yes. Ok, do it.
The only rules I have for Wellbeing Days are:
- Book it on a day when my boys are at school, preferably a Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday because they finish later so I have longer to myself.
- Don't plan anything with anyone. I can book in for a tattoo, piercing, beauty treatment or hair cut but I don't plan anything else.
- NO PRESSURE! If I planned to do something then on the day change my mind it's fine. If I planned to do housework then feel like relaxing I can HOWEVER, I do then ensure I at least do some basics and half an hour housework then relax. Similarly, if I plan to relax and then want to do housework, I can.
- It must be guilt free! Don't feel bad at booking a day off to spend just by yourself and don't feel guilty if you don't do what you planned.
I don't always book these far in advance. Sometimes I'll look at my calendar, see there hasn't been a bank holiday or any other annual leave booked so will plan a Wellbeing Day around that. But recently have done it either side of the bank holiday to give myself some days to do something with my fiancé and/or my boys and then have a Wellbeing day.
Recently I had one of the best Wellbeing Days I've ever had.
It was the day after the Easter Bank Holiday Monday. I had been feeling a bit overwhelmed and just needed a day to reconnect with myself.
I'd already had half a Wellbeing Day, unplanned as my boys went out with my mum for the afternoon so I sat in the garden with my cats, sat on a 12 Step Meeting, journaled and painted a bookcase. It felt lovely and made me look forward to the Tuesday when I had my Wellbeing Day planned in.
I had 8:30 - 4pm to myself in between school hours.
I caught up on programmes I wanted to watch. I bought myself a printer and printed off some Wellbeing related resources I wanted for some virtual courses I'm doing. I attended a 12 Step meeting, I organised my Pinterest boards. I just relaxed.
After having days of feeling heavy and like there was a darkness around me I felt light. The world felt lighter.
It can be so easy to feel pressure to do something when you have a day booked off work.
"I don't have anything exciting to say if someone asks what I have planned or what did I do?"
For me now, I get excited at saying "I'm having a Wellbeing Day"!
I have tomorrow off as a Wellbeing Day. A shorter one in the hope that my fiancé finishes work early so we can spend some time together. And then Tuesday, another 8:30 - 4pm to just relax. No pressure, just following my Wellbeing Day rules.
Wellbeing Days are something I highly recommend for everyone. A great way to avoid burnout, reconnect with yourself and do the things you love.
